I’m blown away from the over 300 personal notes that people have sent in response to the last message about my trip. In fact, if you’ve sent me a personal reply and haven’t heard back yet, you will shortly.
So many people – friends, old work contacts, people following me who I’ve never met – told me how much I touched them with my courage and vulnerability.
And they in turn touched me. So thank you to everyone who e-mailed / replied / PM’ed / texted.
My courage is easy to write about (“hey everyone, check it out, look what I did!”)
My vulnerability; not so easy to share.
Though that’s what people connected with.
When I write something that shows me in a confused, indecisive, weak light, I think “people don’t need to hear that.” And I try to talk myself out of it.
Then I get that anxiety. The one that says “it’s the truth, we don’t want to let anyone else know it.”
But it’s that truth that makes me human. It makes you connect with me.
The thing is, I don’t want to be seen as human! (at least my ego doesn’t anyway.) I want to be seen as this awesome, perfect, always strong man.
I can do a good job putting up that front. Though we all know, on some level, that it isn’t the whole truth.
The truth is that I get scared, doubt my own decisions, get lonely. Do stupid stuff for no reason.
Then act like it’s all under control.
But it’s not.
And my life-long lesson is being OK with that.
Right now, on this trip, I’m scared. I feel directionless. I’m questioning myself. I am judging some of my decisions.
And it’s hard to tell you that.
I’m not looking for sympathy, advice, or anything really, just to accept myself, and acceptance from you, as to what I’m going through.
As all this is part of my process.
So once again, I will have to talk myself into pushing “SEND” or “POST” on this message.
Thinking who really wants to read about my messed up inner process?
Though I know the answer is you.
So the one thing I’m going to ask for in the comments, PM, e-mail, or however, is for you to share.
Share something vulnerable.
What’s going on with you? What’s one thing causing you discomfort in your life right now?
Where are you scared, angry, holding back, not showing up like you want to?
Something that gives you pause when it comes to writing it and sending it?
Don’t talk about what vulnerability means to you, what you did go through in the past, or any other “bypass.” It’s easy to preach; not so easy to share.
You have to go inside, connect to your feelings that are present, and figure out what’s going on in there.
Write something that you are going through personally, that’s present. Be specific.
It’s amazing how healing it can be just by putting it out there, and being OK with it.
Because just like this note probably made you feel less alone, it would make *me* feel less alone.
And thanks for being on the journey with me.
**Stay tuned for my next update, where you will learn what the Psychic told me about my trip**